Phases

Medjugorje, July 2007

All of us go through different phases in life. Just like marriage, which can be likened to a three-ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering. We may add a fourth one: boring. Or just like married life. During the 1st Year: The man speaks and the woman listens; 2nd Year: The woman speaks and the man listens; 3rd Year: They both speak and the neighbors listen; 4th Year: Both woman and man speak and their children listen; 15th Year: Parents speak but teenage children do not listen and 50th Year: Both man and woman are too deaf to listen.

There is no easy way to define, describe, explain and expound the Trinity, but this we know: the way to God is the way to happiness. What would bring us to God would be the things that would make us happy. Anything that could bring us happiness is part and parcel of what God is for us because being with God is perfect happiness.

What then would make us happy? To be happy, we need to have a Someone in our lives. That someone could be somebody whom we find a lot of commonality. That someone could be somebody where we see a lot of differences because sometimes, opposites attract. Or most probably we have already found that someone in the person of our spouse, children or family.

Having a Someone in our lives is just the first phase. In order to experience life in its happier moments, we need to be in a relationship with that Someone. Relationship defines what we are to each other. It is not just consequential that I have you here listening to me. It is more significant that I relate to you and you relate with me and that this relationship binds us together.

Because we are related more by faith than by blood, we are exemplified more by commitment than involvement. Jesus was not just involved with us. He committed himself for us. If religion is a relationship of convictions and spirituality is a relationship of faith and understanding, then the only way to happiness, the only way to holiness, the only way to God is through a relationship of individuals and persons based on love.

When we fall in love, when we are in love, whenever we share love, we become one with God who created us. Whenever we fall out of love and whenever we do not share love, we become separated from the God who died for us. And when we no longer love because of the ugly lessons we learned from loving, when we no longer share love because of the hurt and pain we got from loving, we hinder, shut out, choke and cripple the Holy Spirit who comforts us.

Love’s ultimate desire is oneness with the Beloved. In our society, this is present in various respects: companionship, friendship, partnership, ordination or marriage. Most of our happy moments happened when we felt one with that beloved someone: a mother’s assurance of her love, a father’s affirmation of his affection, a husband’s or a wife’s way of caring. Most of our sad moments happened when we felt disconnected: rejection, separation, divorce, betrayal, death, isolation.

It is an obvious reality. There is no happiness in being alone because we are not meant to be alone. Whenever somebody is turned down and rejected, there is a betrayal of the God who is ever abiding and embracing. Whenever somebody feels isolated and excluded, there is a betrayal of the God who is ever present and accepting. And, whenever somebody feels alone and helpless, there is a betrayal of a God who is ever compassionate and understanding.

The good Lord did not go through the phases in understanding us, but He was in each of the three phases. We are that Someone God the Father created. God the Son brought us to a new kind of a relationship. And, we have God the Spirit uniting us to this communion of Persons we still cannot fully understand, the Most Holy Trinity.


7 June 2009

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